Cheetos for the Brain

Did you ever find yourself watching a television
program that most might consider as just "cheap television?" Bad t.v.; something that you wouldn't normally watch, but for some reason you can't turn the channel. Sort of like a car wreck- you shouldn't stare, but you do. And just like looking at the car wreck, you're embarrased to admit that you watched the show. We all do it. But why? It's Cheetos for the brain- or at least that's my theory and I'm sticking to it. So here's my first in a series of .....

Shows I'm Embarrassed To Admit I Watch
and sometimes enjoy

My Super Sweet Sixteen- MTV

I was channel surfing and caught this ridiculous show, but couldn't stop watching it. I was astounded at the level of low class, rude, and crass behavior. I am appalled that the parents of these teens permit this behavior. In most cases I see the parent encouraging the selfish, obnoxious brats and condone their childish temper-tantrums. The show details the lavish planning of a teen's rite of passage into their 16th year of existence. It always showcases a very wealthy family's teenager and how they plan a lavish party. They show everything from the planning, the invitation process (yes, process- these kids don't use the postal service), to the clothing, the entertainment, and the trials and tribulations of planning an "EVENT" that will talked about and envied by all for years and years to come (dum, dum, dum- dramatic music.) The little princess or prince is burdened by details of the grand spectacle and having to deal with the most common breed of people (that would be everybody else) "that just have no sense of style or class, Mommy/Daddy," in the planning and execution of THEIR PARTY is just too much for some teens.

THE ATTIRE- This usually involves a trip to the most expensive clothing boutique, designer shop, haute couture salon, a visit from a celebrity stylist, or a trip to Paris, or some other city because, "gasp" they cannot be outdone by anyone else at the party. Most teens have 2 dresses/outfits/costumes, whatever- one for the grand entrance and the other for the rest of the party. It usually entails some throwing of clothing and comments about someone's bad taste in fashion. If it's a girl teen, there is always an enoromous show of breasts and cleavage.

THE INVITATION PROCESS- Oh yes, this is a process. MTV always shows the pompous brat deciding which lucky ones will be chosen to attend the grand gala, and which ones are so uncool and loathsome that they would never be invited out from the "leper island" they must live on. Sometimes they show the anguish of the teens not "tapped" to appear before the guest of honor. Once in a while, they crash the party and the super sweet 16 actually looks like the victum, for about 20 seconds- tears of sorrow; how can these people be doing this to me? Everyone wants a piece of me and I just can't do it anymore.

THE GRAND ENTRANCE- This event usually involves a large or showy vehicle driven by a chauffeur. They show all the "friends" waiting in sheer anticipation of the grand arrival of the brat that they really don't like, but are relieved they were invited by him/her, none the less.

THE ENTERTAINMENT- The entertainment is a spectacle, too. This part usually involves a cast of entertainers (circus, performance artists, or bevy of busty girls/six-pack ab guys who are hired to walk around, dance around, carry, fawn over, or maybe even feed the guest of honor.) The audition process of choosing these girls or guys fits right in line with the rest of the teen's low-class morals. But, sometimes the entertainer is a singer/rapper/hip-hop entertainer (usually someone who has a high level of self-importance, too, and demands a large amount of money to perform- just to see if they can get it.)

Frankly, MTV does a great job of editing to show the truely shallow people in this world, what money does to them. It intertwines fits of crying, selfishness, abnormal levels of self importance, and a lack of concern for anyone else not devoted to their own cause- My Party and Me. Oh wait, I can't forget the grand finale of ...

THE NEW VEHICLE-Always a lavish, expensive, ridiculous vehicle for a new teen driver. It is always preluded by a scene with the parent (usually the dad) who refuses to buy the vehicle when they go car shopping. Side note: how did they get to the overly, expensive, car dealership in the first place to have the "I'm not buying this car for you" conversation? Hummm... This scene involves another foot-stomping temper tantrum, and is sometimes laced with the lip-pouting, or "daddy-smoozing" little girl routine. But, the parent, never to let down the expectations of the little princess/prince, always comes through with the car of their dreams. Oh, Daddy, you did buy it!! (wink, wink)

Nauseating, completely nauseating. It is so bad, it makes me want to take all the toys from my kids' rooms, just to make sure my kids don't turn out like this. I really haven't seen one of these kids (and yes, they are kids- a product of their parents) that I liked or would permit my children to associate with. They exhibit disgusting, selfish behavior. But, I will watch this show again if I happen to come across the "marathon." I only wish MTV would show a follow-up with these same kids after a "social, humanitarian intervention" where they actually do something good for society. No, not everyone with money has to be an Oprah, but with the resources they have they could do something else other than spending a gross amount of money on a party that could literally remove 20,000 kids from proverty. (based on a party budget of $100,000 and using $5,000 per child to buy medicine, or provide a clean living space.)

Somebody, please drive these kids to a homeless shelter, food kitchen, children's hospital, hospice care facility, church, library, animal shelter, Burger King, nursing home, something, so they can see that the world doesn't revolve around them.